blogging

Change Your Preposition, Change Your Funny

Nobody likes being laughed at, except maybe comedians. So, I decided to change things up a bit. I’ll say, “I’m not laughing at you.” Then I’ll pause. The other person will usually, say something about me laughing with them. I’ll cut them off… “No. I’m not laughing with you either. I’m laughing around you.” LOL

Simply changing the preposition can make that statement really funny:

I’m laughing within you

I’m laughing above you

I’m laughing beside you

I’m laughing aboard you

I’m laughing beyond you

I’m laughing from you

I’m laughing near you

I’m laughing through you

I’m laughing via you

It’s a lot of English nerdy fun 😀

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blogging

What Would My Clone Do?

I had a lot on my mind today. Between the myriad ideas at work (new products, new advertising opportunities, improving customer service, etc.) and the questions I face in my personal life, I found myself in a state of self discovery. So, I asked myself a very simple question: What Would My Clone Do?

Not hampered by the events of every day life: cold shower water in the morning, burning toast, traffic, and waiting in line at lunch… My clone would have a much clearer head than I during times of stress. He would be able to make sold decisions during times of crisis, like choosing between watching two equally great prime-time television shows. So, I find peace knowing that my clone is always there for me, calm and ready to take on whatever pressures may come my way (like when I’m running late to a massage appointment).

blogging

New Hollywood Diet

I’ve got a new Hollywood diet idea! It came to me as I’m lying here in bed for the second day in a row with a cold. I managed to get this cold just a couple of days after getting a flu, so I’ve been sick 4 days out of the last 7. There is one tremendous upside though. I’ve never been in better shape! I’ve lost 5 lbs and practically have a six pack now!

So, here is my Hollywood diet idea: Inject people with live flu cultures. They’ll get sick and shed weight like crazy. Between the diarrhea (colon cleanse), coughing and sneezing (great core workout), and dehydration (helps you look more chiseled), this diet technique will quickly become a major trend in Hollywood. Plus! when we are sick, we usually lose our appetite. It’s a natural appetite suppressant! And when you run a 101 degree fever, your body really burns calories! Who needs diet pills when you’ve gone swine flu!!!

Business, cool stuff, Funny, humor, just for fun, media, News, technology

The Sun is the Center of the Web

In a stark blow to the Holy Roman Catholic Church, experts in Internet technology have concluded that the World is not the center of the World Wide Web. In fact, scientists now suggest that Sun is the center of the Internet! Experts were also quick to announce that MySQL was not going to hire Bill Parcels as the General Manager.

I wonder if all of this is going to mean that my GoDaddy PHP sites are going to run a little faster now!