Archive for the ‘baseball’ Category

Commissioner Bud Selig announced today that Major League Baseball would remain a illegitimate sport by rewarding steroid users with trophies titles and records. He stated that unlike other professional sports that strip athletes of their wins and records even years after they accomplished them, Major League Baseball would not join the realm of legitimate sports. “We made too much money from this, and will be teaming up with the WWE to provide even greater entertainment and record breaking headlines. You never know.”

Commissioner Selig also announced a plan to honor the rampant use of steroids in baseball over the last decade. The 2008 season will mark a shrinkage in the ball size in baseball. The decision to reduce the bat has not been made yet, but Bud Selig announced, “Ball shrinkage is the best way we can think of to honor steroids monetary gift to Major League Baseball.”

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